Dr Kristopher Lovell

I find it extremely hard to write about Covid. On the eve before the outbreak of Covid-19 I found myself unemployed after quitting a job. In hindsight, it was a very dangerous and risky move as the news about the virus was still coming in. However Covid inadvertently presented an opportunity. Strangely enough Covid was what was able to allow me to break into a job that I am not sure I would have been able to get otherwise. As the financial services sector rushed to move everything to work from home I already had all the equipment required and thus I was able to leverage this to obtain a job I never would have considered in the past.

That is not to say that the Covid pandemic has been all good. The biggest impact that it has had has been the utter decimation of my social life. As an introvert, my social life was something that I found very hard to develop and took years to cultivate. As the pandemic continued to drag on, things began to slow. Friends who I had known for years suddenly became harder to talk to as we couldn’t see each other. Messaging each other, which was something to do on the side of things, became a regular occurrence as the restrictions tightened. Conversation topics slowly began to exhaust as we talked to each other day after day trying to figure out ways to entertain each other, and it became a chore rather than something to do for fun.

However, what was truly shocking has been its affect on mental health, something that is often overlooked. I have seen parts of my family that I would never have considered as being susceptible to issues of a mental nature stumble. It is truly a humanising moment, when somebody you can sometimes view as invincible, buckles under the pressure and is struggling to work through the crisis.

Covid will likely define the coming decade as the damage will leave both seen and unseen scars on the world. In a post-pandemic world I would hope that we hold much of the initial attitudes that were brought out in the earliest days of the pandemic. That we are all in this together. That we need to support each other and extend help to those who need it. The cynical part of me believes that will not happen and that we’ll all want to pretend this never happened. That we’ll cover up the cracks that Covid has exposed instead of taking positive steps to fix them. I realise that the pandemic is but a fleeting moment in history and that nothing lasts forever, I also realise people who it has effected will last far beyond Covid’s brief span. There has been no talk as to how to help people in the long term past Covid and this worries me.

If we could capture the attitudes which we met the outbreak with, of empathy, willingness to help and co-operation then we really can build a post pandemic future to look forward to.

Introverted, and indifferent, and yet with a bachelor’s degree in Nutrition and Dietetics.

I quit my job some time in September, simply because the company couldn’t find me a schedule to work, and exercise my skills as a Nutrition Counselor, and that the fact that I am paid only when I work. The CoVID-19 really has done its work to screw everyone over, and somehow I feel as if the ones that died from this disease are the most fortunate. I’m quite sure my country isn’t the only one that got its people screwed over with bad governmenting, and something of that kind in between, but yeah, it’s bad. Life in COVID-19 surely had it’s rough starts, the quarantining, the panic, and the initial wave of panic buying, which prompted the government to make purchase regulations so everyone gets their needed supplies. As things calmed down, and everyone got the gist of what was going on. Everyone adapted, slowly but surely, and even until now I’m seeing it. And to no one’s surprise, the government is still being shit, to a point that it’s not worthy of discussion, they’re just that irrelevant to the crisis.

The best things I have seen so far in the middle of this pandemic, or if it should be called that with the current condition of the virus really, is that businesses are becoming the norm. With everyone in their homes, and, mostly likely, out of a job because they can’t get to their workplace, I have seen a lot of self-employed businesses lately, from simple general goods stores, to just being freelancers. Somehow, with the breakdown of the mainstream means of providing, and acquiring services, people have turned on to themselves to provide, and acquire said services. Along with this, the smaller businesses, the simple ones that one can see in a reasonable apartment building, they’re open, and doing fine, from photocopy shops to even street vendors, we just made improvisations to adapt, and to fit the current times.

And weirdly enough, even with the set curfews, there is some form of a nightlife. Mostly, still, street vendors, selling wares, and street dishes, and the others are just the ones that like to enjoy the cold breeze of the night, and not being stuck inside their homes from a brief period.

I wasn’t sure what to type when I first came across this website so I’m sorry if it feels so random, there’s a certain catharsis that I felt when I started typing the paragraphs, and I just had to keep going. I might make more posts soon, and hopefully it is more organized.

-ELB

As an introvert living in rural and remote sweden I can’t say that covid has affected me in any noticable way. Yes there are less acticities on offer, the local cinema is closed, but i enjoy my solitude and the calm and quiet of nature. I do feel sympathy for my extroverted friends who tell me that they feel traped and are going stir crazy.
For me the decreases in big social acticities are more like a tiny blessing.

That’s not to say that everything is fine. I’m a diabetic and I do worry that i’d suffer extra hard if i were to get Covid. But then again, that’s out of my hands.
I have two jobs and both have seen their respective work load deminish due to Covid as industries slow down and people are encouraged to stay at home. I have no fearof loosing either of my jobs but they do make less money and i’ve cut down on work time with one of my employments.
Though in turn i’m looking into starting my own buissnes.

The hardest part is dealing with the mental health of my family. Some om my family members are almost in a constant panic over covid, fearing death around every corner. Complaining that we should fully isolate ourselves and stop working, only to turn around and have a panic attack over the reduced income. Feeling helpless in face of a loved ones faltering mental health is what’s truly taking it’s toll on me.

I compartmentalize covid, i take it in strides, i’m doing alright. Looking through the history books covid is hardly worth a foot note. We’ve seen so much worse, things that we can’t even pretend to understand the darkness of. But i hope for the sake of all those that don’t feel fine, that covid will soon be over.

01.11.20

The mood of the country definitely feels to have changed. During the first lockdown there was a pulling together, a sense of we’re all in this together that I feel is lacking now. I think it’s a combination of lockdown fatigue, impatience and a realisation that, in fact, we’re not all in this together. Various government figures or their close families have been caught breaking lockdown rules with zero repercussions. Whether it’s Dominic Cummings with his trip to Durham, his drive to Barnard Castle and the laughable excuses and lies that were offered in the aftermath or the Prime Ministers dad swanning off abroad, coming back without observing quarantine and not bothering with a mask when in enclosed public spaces it has an air of ‘one rule for them, another for us’. I expect general public compliance to be a lot lower than the first wave. There’s anger at the government, some are angry at another lockdown even occurring due to their concern about the economic damage whereas others are angry that it’s happened weeks after SAGE initially recommended another lockdown followed by Starmer asking for one. From the Free School meals fiasco to the corruption in the PPE procurement system most people I speak to have limited to zero trust in the competency of the current government

Beyond that there’s brexit looming, the tory government seems to either not care about the prospects of no deal or is actively aiming for it. The economic impact of brexit combined with Covid-19 is going to batter this country and I’m concerned what it could lead to. People who are desperate and angry and easy prey for extremist rhetoric and from my talks with colleagues, ex-colleagues rather, I know how appealing voices such as Farage and Stephen ‘Tommy Robinson’ Yaxley-Lennon are to many working class people who view themselves as abandoned and left behind. There’s a deep well of anger waiting to be tapped and I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t had some sleepless nights worrying about the potentials.

As a more personal entry I lost my job 2 weeks ago, I kind of expected it but it’d still hurt a bit. I worked in purchasing for a catering equipment company and the sales are way down. The CFO, Chief Financial Officer, was almost in tears when she broke the news to me. I’ll miss my colleagues. Going back to personal issue I’m the main breadwinner for my family and am concerned for the family future even with our savings, there are not a lot of available jobs in my area. At least we’re not over-leveraged debt wise and can easily afford our mortgage and living expenses for the next 12 months; there’s many people in a much worse position than us and my heart goes out to them. My autistic son, 4 years old, is enjoying school, we were so relieved to get him into a special needs school and he’s flourishing there. Thankfully he’s too young to realise the strange times we live in, I do feel for the confusion older children must be experiencing who have had their lives turned upside down through missing school then subsequently having to adapt to changed educational environments. My fiance is well, just like every other challenge we face it together, I’m so lucky to have someone like her to share my life with. While she shares the same concerns I do regarding the countrys future she doesn’t have the knowledge of history and international relations that I do to see the rhymes and parallels and sometimes I think that gives her some peace of mind – I’m trying to keep my rants to a minimum to give her some peace and will do so here.


That’s enough rambling for now, I’m a terrible typist so I apologise for any typos I missed.

The news of the firebreak in Wales is not unexpected but I’m unexpectedly distressed about it. Having just built up the confidence to create a bubble with some friends, we started going for walks more regularly and that contact was like a buoy in a rough ocean. Now that’s gone.

On top of that my work load has increased and I’m working with people who are highly anxious and stressed about the situation. It’s difficult to hold optimism for them when I can’t find it myself.

The government makes decisions about lockdowns, turning a blind eye again to groups of people who need support: pregnant people and those with mental health issues in particular spring to mind. They’ve denied free meals to hungry children. It’s harder and harder to find hope.

Hi RecordCOVID-19
JJust realised it is months since I last contributed …. which is an indication of 1) my lapse into laziness, 2) thinking nothing of importance has happened to me, and 3) ricocheting between full on online life and avoidance…
For the Record, I still feel guilty because I am liking (most) of my lockdown / isolationist life. I have just enough work to get by, I have a fantastic house and garden, I have a lot of walks by turning left or right out of my back door and about 4000 DVD / blu-rays; that’s the upside. But I realise that it is now about 9 months since I have seen grandkids (and sons and families) and that’s a long old time which zoom and teams doesn’t replicate. The anxiety of rushing between West Wales (ill partner) and Somerset (ill mother) has subsided as they are both ok-ish.
Having become 62 earlier in the month, I have come to terms that I have now entered old age (on my scale of youth 0-30, middle 31 – 61, old 62 – whenever .. maybe 91 as projected by an online social media quiz recently!).
On the subject of online social media quizzes, don’t do them. It just feeds the global machine with all sorts of seemingly random data which is linked up and creates profiles of meta-data about you. And have you signed up to (NOT) the NHS tracking app? I have a smart phone that I think could handle it … but I don’t go anywhere and I don’t meet anyone and most of the places I visit around here have no mobile signal .. so I can’t see the point, even If I thought it was effective. The data for (NOT) the world beating track and trace has deteriorated since the app was launched, what’s going on with that?
Resolution in old age … contribute more regularly to this record.

It’s been a while since I recorded my thoughts on the ongoing global pandemic, and recently these thoughts have changed.

I started a new position as a PGCE student at the begining of September, and honestly, aside from having to wear a mask, you wouldn’t have thought that anything was going on. People weren’t social distancing, university based teaching was happening, and there was a distinct lack of masks being worn on public transport. With the introduction of the new tier system (which let’s be real here, probably isn’t going to have a positive impact at all), the virus has been thrust back into my vision.

Starting my work placement was a shocking experience, the sheer number of children all on top of one another in classrooms which are nowhere near big enough to accommodate a 2 metre radius. It’s no surprise that infection rates have been going up rapidly since the start of the accademic year, nor is it surprising that I am now having to self-isolate as I have presented symptoms of COVID-19 (for which I have been tested).

I honestly think that the impact that this enviornment will have on these kids in school is going to have a long lasting affect. They’re localised to one classroom all day, and then also contained within year group bubbles, the idea being that a positive case should only take out one year group, rather than the entire school. It makes sense to us, but I think the students are getting fed up with the virus.

They’re getting sick of being told to put their masks on, they’re getting sick of being told to disinfect their hands when coming and going. And I think this is leading to a number of behavioural problems. Unfortuantely I can’t go into too much detail about that.

The virus is ever present for the students, in fact, I am sure that my absence this week will have sparked a number of discussions and theories about whether I have COVID or not. In ever class that I observed last week, there were at least 5 questions or discussions relating to the virus; Key stage 4 students are concerned as to whether they’re going to be able to sit their exams in the summer (which following the Scottish decision to cancel their exams is a reasonable quesiton to ask). They’re asking whether we’re going to be going into another lock down. And we as staff haven’t got the answers to these questions, because we’re asking them to.

I forsee this level of uncertainty continuing well into the New Year.

Hundreds of thousands losing their jobs. Cinema, pubs, football clubs, night clubs, music venues shutting down. A culture and way of life ebbing away. Millions of people losing out. Art dying. Is it worth it? Is it worth losing so much to save so few, many of whom did not have long left anyway? The oppression of the lockdown is not just the restrictions but the fact that you can’t question them . In private many, many think it’s gone too far but to say that, or even just to ask is it worth it, is to incur wrath and condemnation. People who happily poison the air with diesel fumes from their SUVs or consume, consume, consume any manner of things that kill the planet, shout down on those who wonder if the cure is worse than the disease. They call us callous or uncaring, blind to their own failings and the millions of deaths from other things. The result is we shut up and follow the rules or bend them quietly. We feel sorry for those who die but not those who sanctimoniously refuse to consider there might be other ways of approaching things. If you want to know what people think about the lockdown look not just to those who shout loudly about what must be done, listen to the whispers of a quiet majority who are seething at what is being done to our communities and our futures.

I have zero faith in this government. I’m not just saying that because I don’t vote Conservative; I genuinely believe that Theresa May, Dominic Grieve, or Philip Hammond would have done a better job here, but the country voted and this is what we got.

We knew the calibre of people they were, and I guess a lot of folks just thought they were the best option available, in all seriousness. It’s not like they’d have to deal with anything more serious than crossing Ts and dotting Is on a Brexit deal, right? Well shit.

Looks like things happen, crises develop, and when you vote in a bunch of charlatans the best they can offer when it comes to crunch time amounts to warm words and a half price takeaway. Cool, thanks Chancellor, that cheeky Nando’s is going to help – at least help with this second spike caused by you and your friends telling us all to get out there and spend, spend, spend!

And this is just one small slice of it. I can’t even joke about the IT failure with an Excel spreadsheet, the throwing of the Arts sector under the bus, the uni students trapped in their accommodation, it’s all just a big noise of awfulness. This is before you look at the 40,000+ covid deaths, although who knows if the government might revise them away at a whim because they need a win right now, any win they can get, just to show how strong and stable they are right now.

Nobody trusts them. Nobody likes them. But we’ve got no other choice right now. At least people seem to have tried to keep calm and carry on for the second spike, far less in the way of toilet paper hoarding. I fucking hate that twee poster anyway, patronising piece of nostalgia-wank.

Phew. Time to get back to the real world and hope this is as bad as 2020 gets.